Tuesday, September 29, 2009

If you need a laugh....

K, I'm not one of those people who's all ga-ga over babies. But this will make you laugh. Seriously, try it.

I know this is mean....but mean stuff makes me laugh. If you also laugh at mean things, go to this website. It's funny.



Yesterday was my Dad's birthday. I think he turned 50. I emailed him and called but there was no one home. Anyways, I hope he had a good day.

Today, is my brother's birthday. He is turning 26 I think. I say "I think" because for a good part of this year I believed I was only 26. Then my mother shattered my life by informing me I was in fact 27. Anyways, for the next month and a half he will only be a year younger than me. In a month and a half I will be turning 28. Ugh.

I have to quit smoking

Here was my night in a nutshell:

-It got sunny so I decided to do the dog walk after all (new weekly group I joined, where a bunch of local people all go on a dog walk together)
-On the way there it started raining
-Drove all the way to bognor marsh...no one was there
-Drove to the animal shelter to find out if maybe it got cancelled...no it was still on, but I had gone to the wrong end of the conservation area. There was no need for me to drive all the way to Bognor at all...the walk was actually starting from near the Billy Bishop Airport.
-Found everyone and joined in for what I thought would be a half hour walk (since I had already missed half an hour)
-No.....was an HOUR AND A HALF HIKE thorough an actual muddy MARSH and up a the friggin escarpment!!! IN THE RAIN. Going up was the worst. I realized how out of shape I am....and my legs turned to jello, I couldn't even speak cause I was so winded and I actually felt like I was going to barf. It was like 8th grade track & field all over again.
-Got back in the van, with 2 muddy dogs.....and Jonas proceeded to step on the ashthray and spill it all over the floor of the mother-in-law's van. GAWD.
-Race to Sunrise Auto Cleaners and spend 20 minutes vaccumming out van in the pouring rain.
-Decide not to go to Home Depot, which had been my plan all evening. I was even going to use it as my excuse to dodge out of the walk early.
-Felt guilty about not buying switchplates so when I got home I painted a second coat in the livign room and sanded & painted one little wall in the dining room that had never been done.
-Cooked a giant bowl of carbs (I mean pasta), read Twilight and went to bed.

The boy should go away more often. I am getting a lot done.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Pugs always look sad....

....but this one is the saddest.

Thanks for sending me these Brad!
Sometimes when I'm in a brutal meeting I wish my dogs had cell phones so I could text back and forth with them.

Mouse traps & power outages

So the boy can never make fun of me for my packing issues ever again. See, anytime I go away, I take way too much, not unlike most girls I know. We could be going away for 2 nights to my hometown and I will pack for every possible scenario, and as if we were going for 2 weeks. Anyways, last night the boy left for a 4 day job in Parry Sound. It's only about 3 hours from here. But he can never make fun of me ever again for packing too much. He had like 8 bags. In his defence I guess the guys who are going with him had to bring their own food & bedding and everything. But still. See what I mean?
Anyways he picked a friggin GREAT night to go. There was an insane thunderstorm last night. The lightening woke me up before the thunder did...and it takes a LOT to wake me up. So I had 4 dogs in bed with me. And I couldn't get back to sleep because the power was flickering....and I was having to re-set my alarm clock and was scared I would sleep in. Sigh.....

THEN....this morning I got up and me & the dogs (I know, I know, the dogs & I) went downstairs for feeding time (feeding time for the dogs, not me), and all the dogs gathered around this one cupboard under the sink and were staring at it...so I knew there must be a mouse running around in there. It's that time of year. Unfortunately when I opened the cupboard it was not running around....it's head was caugh tin the mouse trap but it WAS STILL ALIVE!!! (Insert gagging noises here)Anyways, I started crying and shut the cupboard and debated what to do. My first though was to drown it because I've heard that is what you are supposed to do......but that seemed even worse than any other possible scenario....so I got out the oven mitts, and brought the whole darn thing outside to the front porch.....the little guy was still moving around and stuff and wasn't bleeding or anything....do you know how hard it is to open a mouse trap while wearing over mitts and trying not to touch a squirmy mouse? Not easy...anyways, I finally got it open...and the little guy just ran off...ok, he kind of hopped off...or limped, whatever. But I saved him! See, I wouldn't have told this story unless there was a happy ending.

Now, I am all for being an independent woman, and being able to deal with tough scenarios on my own. after all, Before I met the boy I lived on my own for 10 years. But still, I guess we get used to having a team mate around who takes care of the icky jobs for us. Anyways, it made me miss him even more. I know, I know....he's only gone for 4 days. And he's only 3 hours away. Other people have to endure much worse. But this is the first time he's ever left ME. Usually I am the one gallavanting off on little adventures while he stays put and takes care of things on the homefront. Like wrangling 4 dogs for feeding time...and emptying mouse traps, and fixing blown fuses and doing the dishes when they are REALLY gross. He left me the sweetest letter under the alarm clock, which I found when I went to bed. And it made me cry. And it reminded me why I love him. And those reminders are nice every once in a while. That being said, I will be able to get through this week just fine. I get extra room in bed, and am looking forward to copious amounts of gossip & catching with some good girlfriends. See, the glass is always half full (of red wine) in my world.

Friday, September 25, 2009

My trip ended up being some of the best 10 days of my life. So the embarssing flight incident was worth it http://discocowgirl.blogspot.com/2009/09/i-was-just-reading-one-of-my-favourite.html. I lived out my dream of being right up there with Bodhi (RIP) and Keanu Reeves....one thing I've wanted to do all my life...I tried surfing. I was terrible yet it only served to fuel my delusion that I am meant to go pro.

This is my brother & SIL...they surf all the time. I hope these brats know how lucky they are.

This was sunset at carmel Beach. Heaven on Earth. People had their dogs running loose, camfires going, bottles of wine open. I could live here.
Is this place even real?!?!

Anyways, I can't wait to go back. But it's still always nice to get home. Even when I come home to 4 slobberings dogs and a house under renovation and a boy covered in drywall dust. Ok, maybe I could have spent a few more days on the sunny beaches of Cali. But only a few.
I was just reading one of my favourite blogger's postings today. She was writing from the plane and it reminded me how much I hate flying.

First of all, you can try all you want to explain jet propulsion and the laws of physics & gravity and all that.....but I still don't get how planes can fly. and i HATE when people use that old cliche "Well, you know, flying IS safer than driving."

No. It's not. I've been driving all my life. I've never had my car hijacked. Plus, I've been in a number of accidents throughout my life. none too serious, thank god....but nonetheless....some were a little more serious than just a fender bender. Yet, I've never been killed. However, you find yourself in a "little accident" aboard a plane....and you're SCREWED.

Anyways...last time I flew was in March when I went o visit my Bro & SIL in California. I had the easiet flight ever. I got dropped off at the airpiort so I didn't have to worry about parking. Of course since I was flying alone I was anxious about:

-getting lost
-not going to the right terminal
-missing my flight
-losing my ticket
-losing my passport
-losing my luggage

I checked my passport and ticket every 5 seconds. God bless Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Anyways, i made it onto the plane without so much as a hitch (completely unlike the last time I flew alone, but that is a story for another day). The flight was long, I didn't sleep very well. Unfortunate, since my plan had been to take a Gravol and sleep through the entire 6 hour flight to San Francisco. (in the end, I also decided to forgo the Gravol since I am known to snore like a drunked 80 year old man and I thought about how embarassing that would be if I was disturbing all the other passengers on the plane while being completely oblivious to it). Anyways, I watched 2 movies and what seemed like entire seasons of both The Office & Two & a Half Men. finally we were getting closer to landing. We were ove rthe mountins, I could see homes, and pools and the Bay......and then I could see the airport and the runway......I had made it! My plane had not crashed, it hadn't been hijacked (although I had alleviated this fear earlier in the flight by convincing myself no one would really benefit by hijacking a flight going from Toronto to San Francisco anyways), I hadn't barfed, my earsdrums were not feeling as if they were going to explode from the changes in altitude (although I was now deaf in one ear)....nope, we were about to land and all was well - "GAH!!!!!"

This was actually the noise that escaped (LOUDLY) from my mouth before I even knew it. My hands simultaneously flew to the arm rests and grabbed on with all my might. we were crashing. I just heard a huge thud and the plane THUMPED and dropped. Oh Jesus. Then I noticed the guy beside me looking at me. As soon as I saw him looking at me (as if I were a lunatic) he quickly averted his eyes and looked calmly out the window. I followed his gaze...and saw that we had actually landed. The loud thump was the landing gear. We were safe. And not even in the air. I'm such a geek. Get me off this plane now.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

"The little hand says it's time to rock & roll"

I know I am a little late on this.....but poor Patrick Swayze. I remember being in grade 4 probably and all the girls in my class were obsessed with him. I was sheltered and didn't know exactly who Patrick Schway-zee was yet......I was a late bloomer into the PS Fan Appreciation Club. In memory of someone who was, by all accounts, a very decent man, not to mention in one of my favourite movies of all time.....here's to you Patrick. May you always only live to get radical.


A Letter from Molly

Hey Boy Dogs,

As the weather turns chilly, here's a little something to warm you up.

Bet you wish you had put a ring on it now, huh?


My Grandpa sent me this

It's a list of tips on how to manage anger at work and generally create a more pleasant, harmonious workplace.

Number 1

TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.

INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

Number 2

TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.

INSTEAD OF: She's a f___ing bit__.

Number 3

TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.

INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

Number 4

TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.

INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

Number 5


INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!

Number 6

TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...

INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

Number 7

TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.

INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___ing problem.

Number 8

TRY SAYING: That's interesting.

INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

Number 9

TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.

INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

Number 10

TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.

INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ didn't you tell me sooner?

Number 11

TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues...

INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

umber 12

TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?

INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

Number 13

TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?

INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

Number 14

TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.

INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.

Number 15

TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.

INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

Number 16

TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.

INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.

Number 17

TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?

INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

Number 18

TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.

INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.
I love Gampy.
I dyed my hair for the first time in about 3 years the other night. The reason it took me so long was because the last time I dyed my hair I ewound up alternating between hysterics, having a panic attack, lashing out angrily at my brother and sister-in-law for not being able to fix it (horrible yes, but it wasn' tmy best moment). Oh, I also forgot to mention the excruciating pain.

So here's what went down in a nutshell:

-I decided to update my colour, which was already way too light....by going EVEN LIGHTER. Goo dchoices.
-In fact, why not just bleach it and then add a colour afterwards? Perfect.
-Bleaching done...hair is mostly bleached with some reddish and pink portions. I'm not worried yet.
-Apply hair dye.....doesn't take at all. hair is even more patchy now with some caramel coloured portions, some white, some orange, some pink.
-Now panicking.
-Crying, wearing a hat, hair sopping wet, scalp burning, drive to 24-hour pharmacy and spend literally my last $15 (I had recently been fired) on a super dark hair dye that I hope - while not coming close to acheiving my initial desired blonde tresses - will at least serve to cover up all the mess and get me somewhere back to my natural colour.
-Despite numerous warnings from brother & sister-in-law about the dangers of over-processing hair, decide to go ahead an dtry to fix the situation while hair is still wet from first 2 treatments.
-Rinse out dye after 45 minutes of AGONY. Scalp is burning. Beyond anything I've ever done to my hair (and I've done a lot.....4 hours having my hair chemically straightened? Yeah, this was worse). Eyes burning & watering. Depression creeping in. Remember that I have blind date the next day. Hate blind dates. Any "dates". And have just lost whatever small amount of confidence I had about looking somewhat attractive for said date. Also, remembering that I am broke & jobless with no way to pay for newly leased apartment. Not a good time for me.
-Anywho, unwrap towl from around my head to see that my hair is at least 3-4 inches shorter than it had been an hour ago. And it's choppy and uneven. And when I touch it it literally breaks off in my hands like plastic. So after a few moments of grabbing at my hair while screaming at my brother & SIL, "SEE?!?! It just FALLS OUT!!!", my hair ends up even shorter. And a very moussy, washed out brown, not the mysterious and ravishing black I had envisioned. This is what I looked like, and keep in mind this is months after the actual "incident":
Anyways, it took YEARS for my hair to grow back. It was all dead. God, that was a bad time. Incidentally, my blind date the following evening went BRUTALLY. And I like to think maybe it had nothing to do with my sad-ass haircut. But that is a story for another time.
This is the "finally-it-grew-back-and-I-didn't-learn-my-lesson-so-I'm-going-to-try-to-dye-it-one-more-time" look. I'm not 100% sold on the colou rbut the hair dye was on sale for HALF PRICE on the clearance shelf. Also, probably not the wisest idea, but hey, fortunately it worked.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I stole this

I stole this from another blog. You are supposed to answer the questions to feel good and realize what makes your life so great and to help you appreciate those things. That's all real nice but I also like talking about myself (points for honesty?) so I'll give it a shot.

1. Why I Get Out of Bed Everyday…um, mostly to go to work. I like my job but I also need the money for bills. And red wine. And some cute shoes once in a while. Ok, ok......I get to wake up to a great boy and 4 dogs who think I am the best thing to ever walk on two legs (I'm talking about the dogs, not the boy). It's hard not to be at least a bit happy when the alarm goes off.

2. What I Love … Music. My family. My friends. Cottages. Any combination of these. Looking around my place and seeing a bunch of family, having drinks, catching up, laughing, listening to music. Bliss.

3. Where I Have Been …I lived in Europe for 1 year...and I can't believe it's been 12 years. I was only 15...my parents must have been crazy to let me go alone. I think of my step daughter, who will be 15 next year. And she is mature and smart and gorgeous...and if I had any say in the matter I WOULD NEVER LET HER GO AWAY ON HER OWN LIKE THAT! Actually, it was one of the best things to ever happen to me. I have a whole other family over there. While I haven't seen them in over a decade I love them like crazy and think about them all the time. I also visited California last year.....beaches, bonfires, amazing sunsets? I was hooked. I already can't wait to go back. I know why my brother is "the good kid". Great job, great girl, great for a cheap holiday.

4. Where I Want to Go … anywhere with a good beach. I'm a bit of a water baby (a but ironic, seeing my aversion to bathing suits). It doesn't matter if it's a lake or an ocean, count me in. Also, New Orleans. I've wanted to visit there for as long as I can remember.

5. What I Know … it's not always easy to change. Even with the best intentions....it sometimes doesn't happen. I can't always be the person I want to be. But I always am pleased in those moments when I do remember what & who I want to be and make sure I do something about it. And I'm lucky to be close to a couple people who are my definition of "good"....and I hope as I grow older I can be even remotely as amazing as they are. I would be happy with being a fraction as loving and good as these people are.

6. What Motivates Me … competing with my brother for my parents affection. Haha, just kidding. I lost ou ton that one a long time ago! Oddly, my job. I want to learn more about it and continuously improve and see how much I can take on.

7. What I Learned While Doing This Excersice… that most people do like to talk abou tthemselves more than they admit. But sometimes it's fun to write things down and get them out. And it's certainly better than never saying them at all.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Do you ever have those dreams where you are trying to dial a phone number and no matter hwo many times you dial it, you either get it wrong or your fingers just won't push the correct buttons...and it's always - at least in my dreams anyways - like, the most important phone call of my entire life. I'm about to be murdered. Or I have a chance at a great prize if I can only just call the number....right away...but alas, it never works. Well, sometimes I have bouts of panic when i'm actually trying to dial a number and I get it wrong or I miss a number. And I start to freak immediately thinking of my dreams. Anyways, I just thought of this because I had to attempt to sign into my blog about 3 times before it finally worked just now. I entered the wrong password and email address. This isn't even what I was originally going to blog about....but then panic overcame me and I forgot my original intent.

Oh, I was in the Dollar Store yesterday and their Christmas stuff is out!!! I only yesterday decorated my front porch for Thanksgiving....so I know full well it is too early to even THINK about decorating for Christmas. Especially because yesterday was about 25 degrees and I got a bit of sun. Plus, we still have to get through not only Thanksgiving, but Halloween too! But I'm still excited.

What a busy weekend. On Friday night I hosted dinner at my place for the boy's parents 48th anniversary. A great time was had by all....except Friday at work was one of the busiest days of my life. So I was a little stressed trying to get everything ready on time. The boy had called and said he wouldn't be home until about 15 minutes before people were to start showing up...which caused me even MORE stress since it also meant I wouldn't have a car to pick up any of the last minute things I would need. Anyways, I somehow got everything together....finished work at a semi-decent time, picked up the step-daughter, bought some beer & wine (2 stops), raced home, ignored child labour laws by forcing step-daughter to sweep the main floor of the house (figured I could get away with leaving the upstairs as is), did some additional tidying up of my own (hiding unfolded laundry, cleaning bathroom sink & doing dishes) and threw together not one, but two casseroels & got them in the over. Now, since I had borrowed the boy's mother's van, I had agreed to race out and pick them up at 5:30 (as well as his sister) and bring them up to the house. So at 5:15 I realized I miraculouly had everything done - and with 15 minutes to spare. I decided to sit down and enjoy a glass of wine and try to relax before the ensuing madness. I had just reached up into the cupboard and retrieved a wine glass when the back door opened and in tromps the boy's niece...with her hubby and 3 INSANE children in tow. All boys. All under the age of 6. 45 minutes early. The boys proceeded to release my step daughter's hamster (later recovered), dance on a table, move another table from the living room into the dining room...and this was all in the first 15 minutes. Anyways, it ended up being a fabulous night, with lots of wine, good stories, laughing...and family. The party continued, even after the boy & I finally had to call it a night.

I won't bore you with the details of Saturday as it was all work related. Yesterday was nice though. I got to sleep in. Then I hung out with the stepdaughter & her sleepover buddy. When the boy came home we packed up a cooler and went out to a friends place and sat in a field on his property as the kids rode aroun don the 4-wheelers. It was a beautiful day, so while I only knew one of the couples, I still liked sitting in the sun and relaxing.

I wish I had taken some photos on Friday night...but I will be the first to admit my priority was the delicious red wine and my photo taking intentions kind of fell by the wayside.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

By the way, the boy's demolition car didn't do so well. he took a big hit right off the top during his heat and something caught fire...which caused the engine to seize up. I know it's just a little demolition derby....and a small town fall fair. But to him, it's so much fun. He is like a kid with a new toy. He so wanted to do well. I felt so bad for him when after all that work it didn't go the way he wanted. Sometimes I'm not the most empathetic person so I knew it must have touched me to see him so disheartened.

I'm already encouraging him to start thinking about next year. because as much as I hated having that beat up old car in my laneway....I didn't mind this:

There are certainly worse things to come home to than a bunch of boys working on a car. I don't know...there's just somehting about guys who are into manual labour. Sigh.
Ok....so I have a couple of recipes I want to post on here. i was debating. I think recipes, especially thsoe that have been borrowed or passed down are somethign to be terasured and not passed about. But these recipes are so good I want to share them. They are my grandma's. an dthey are failr simple to make...but they are the definition of comfort food.

I will try to remember to share them soon. Don't be discouraged when you read over them. I promise you, if I can make them, they are easy. and so worth it.

speaking of getting discouraged, I just looked up a recipe for Italian Wedding Soup...it's one of my favourites and for some time I've been wanting to make a nice big batch of it, freeze it, and then be able to enjoy it this fall. Then I read over the recips, realized I had neve rheard of half the ingredients and quickly minimized the page. Alright...onto somehting a little simpler. Ah, stuffed mushroom caps. You can't go wrong with that.....muchrooms, a little bit o' cooking wine....onions, garlic...oh, and CHEESE! Ok, ok, there are a few other little things as well. But who cares?!

Friday, September 11, 2009

The boy is in the final hours of working on this year's demolition car for the local fall fair. I am encouraging every other participant to not go easy on him. I do NOT want this car returning to my laneway after tomorrow night's event. Don't get me wrong, I will be cheering the boy and and hoping he doesn't get himself maimed. And hoping he has fun.

But that's it.

A few things about this car:

-He spends days upon days working on it in preparation for the big event

-It has been sitting in my laneway for MONTHS

-My laneway and surrounding lawn are covered in dismantled car parts. So embarassing.

-It means he has various relatives and buddies dropping by to offer their advice, help with the car, drink our beed and use my bathroom. All fine....except one of these buddies does not leave our house. it's been a week now. I'm going insane. And still have 2 days to go.

-We actually spent money on this car.

The good thing is my boy loves it and gets right into it. He throws himself more into this than anything. Some may say this is sad...you may be right. But i love him...so I will suck it up and cheer him on and pray for irreparable damage. To the car. Not him.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

We've started our 2 month ratings period at the radio station. Think "sweeps" for you TV afficionados. Crazy busy. I apologize if my posts come a little less frequently these days...and are littered with expletives and boring work rants.

Kill me now.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

I'm on hold right now with RBC loans...somehow I missed a car payment and I've been on hold with them for like 10 minutes trying to pay it.....I've spoken to 3 different people now......each person has asked me my name, phone number and birthdate......the second guy I spoke to asked if I have an RBC account card.....when I said no he actually SIGHED......then without any warning he transferred me to someone else and that guy went through the entire same spiel with me....name phone number.....DOB......then he said he had to transfer me to another department...so I'm on hold......AGAIN. Oh wait....jut got an actual person.....for a total of .5 seconds...and guess what she asked me...."Would you mind holding?"

Then she put me back on hold without waiting for an answer.

How much do you want to bet the first questions she will ask me will be name, phone number & DOB?

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Bacon makes people do crazy things.


Having the hiccups.....

...makes me want to die.
So I was watching this show last night on the history of rockabilly and rock n' roll & old school rythym & blues....and it was like being back in Music History class. I loved that class. Aside from the practical skills I learned in Radio Broadcasting, that was certainly the most educational class I took.

Anyways, this show last night was incredible...it gave me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. I can honestly say I truly love Rockabilly music. I can't hear it without wanting to dance. It immediately makes me want to move. I love the attitude, the sexiness, everything. I love that in it's early days it went against everything that was normal and acecptable.

I love the outfits, the moves, the voices, the hairstyles.....ahhhh. Sometimes I forget how happy music makes me. It's nice to be reminded.